I Love You, I'll Kill You
by NightwindandFrostbite
Summary: Megatron and Optimus Prime in the desert doing...stuff. Written because Frostbite wanted to see if she could do it. Slash but not smut, 'cuz we don't do that stuff.


Author's Note: This one came about because Frostbite wanted to challenge herself to write a pair that she didn't personally like. Hence, we have Megatron and Optimus Prime. Yay. :) It's kinda sorta unfinished, but there it is…

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I received the call on my private internal com frequency early in the morning. I knew exactly who the call came from because only one other being in the universe possessed the call code to my personal com. It was a simple message, just three bleeps followed by location coordinates. That was the way we had always communicated, he and I: Briefly and concisely.

I spent the next two days reworking the duty roster and dividing up leadership responsibilities between Ironhide and Prowl. I knew they could take care of things for the short time I would be away, that between them they could deal with any problems that might arise.

Besides, I strongly doubted that there were going to be any problems from the Decepticons for the next couple of days, anyway…

At the break of dawn on the third day – which corresponded to the number of bleeps there had been in the message – I started off on my journey to the coordinates I had been given. It had been almost six months since I'd had any time off alone, so it was not unusual for me to suddenly announce my leaving for a solo road trip. Ironhide, of course, objected to my intentions on the grounds that it was too dangerous for me to go off alone to parts unknown with out some sort of back up. I politely noted his objection…and then proceeded to lock out Teletran's skyspy so that it couldn't be used to follow me.

Eight hours after I left Autobot Headquarters, I arrived at my destination. It was a remote, isolated canyon in the desert, scorched, brown, and rocky. The afternoon sunset glared down upon me from a cloudless blue sky, its rays heating my metal skin to almost uncomfortable levels. The nearest human habitation was over a hundred miles away. It was a private and secluded area that he had chosen, yes. It wasn't exactly idyllic, however…

I came to a halt in the middle of the dusty, dirt road and transformed. The rest of my journey would have to be undertaken on foot since the exact coordinates that he had given me were located three miles over the jagged, rocky outcropping that formed the canyon's walls. I groaned inwardly as I began the difficult hike.

_He did this on purpose, I'm sure,_ I thought to myself as I worked my way over boulders only slightly shorter than I was.

For him, getting to the meeting spot would have been effortless because of his flying capabilities. But for me it was quite a bit more work. Of course, I should not have been surprised. He, after all, would delight in making me expend great effort in order to get to him…

_Fine, _I thought determinedly as I continued to fight my way across the rough terrain_. Next time _I'll_ choose the location. _

Despite the difficulty of the hike, I covered the prescribed distance in less than an hour. In fact, I could see my final destination, just on the other side of the hill in front of me. I leaned against the rocky face of the hill and took a moment to run a quick self-diagnostic on all my systems. Everything checked out perfectly. I also double-checked my energy supply and that of my gun, both of which I found to be at full capacity. This was good, for I knew that I was going to need every drop of energon available to me…and then some. The fuel reserves stored in my trailer were also at full capacity. Everything was set.

_Now for the _fun_ part. _I thought sarcastically to myself.

My rifle gripped tightly in one hand, I slowly moved towards the last barrier that stood between me and the individual who had summoned me three days before. Quietly I edged my gun around the side of the rocky hill. I never knew what to expect at meetings like this, so it was always best to take precautions. I peeked over the rock and surveyed the area in front of me and found that it was a large, flat mesa, which looked just about as desolate and featureless as the rest of the surrounding area. It stretched out in front of me for perhaps a hundred yards or so then dropped off suddenly into another steep canyon. But for a few huge boulders as tall as I was, jutting up out of the ground like the rotting teeth of some mountain giant from human mythology, there was nothing to be seen. The place was quiet, with only the sound of a gentle breeze registering in my audios.

I wondered where he was. I was beginning to think that perhaps I had misinterpreted his message. I finally stood up fully and looked around myself more carefully, my gun closely following my gaze.

It was then that I noticed it: A small shiny object resting on a piece of flat sandstone no more than fifty feet away. I lowered my rifle and released the tense breath I hadn't realized I had been holding.

So this, then, was the game he wanted to play. It had been a long time since we'd done any target shooting and it was one of my favorites.

_He knows just how to get to me, _I thought absently as, smiling inwardly, I made my way toward the smooth, tan-colored stone upon which the object I'd noticed was laying. I stooped down slightly in order to pick up the object that had drawn me to this barren and lifeless place hundreds of miles away from Autobot Headquarters. I held the object in my hand and admired its simple yet lethal beauty.

The silver chrome barrel glistened in the harsh afternoon sunlight, creating an illumined reflection on my chest. I ran my fingers along its length and noted the familiar, attractive contrast of black and metallic grey, the perfect symmetry of the scope, the tiny engraved "P-38" on its side, and the graceful curve of the trigger. The weapon I held was a phenomenal example of Cybertronian power and ingenuity encased in a bold and handsome alien design.

I wrapped my hand around the black stock and looped my finger with easy familiarity through the trigger. Raising the gun to eye level, I targeted a pile of stones a hundred yards away and fired. A pink stream of focused energy spat out of the gun's barrel and what had once been a pile of rocks was in the next second a smoldering pile of ashes. I took a deep breath to try to slow my pulse. It was always a bit of a high for me to have control over such a powerful weapon, even more so with this one because the weapon was voluntarily giving up _his_ control over himself and fully entrusting it to me. It was, I knew, a rare gift…

I took two more shots, choosing smaller and more distant targets, and then I tossed the gun straight up into the air. Gracefully transforming while doing a complete flip in mid-air and then landing perfectly on his feet before me, Megatron, leader of the Decepticons…smiled at me.

"Well done, as usual, Prime," he said.

"I'm sure you can do much better," I replied noncommittally as I handed him my own weapon.

As Megatron took my weapon and turned around to scan the terrain for appropriate targets, he said haughtily, "Of course. I've always been a much better sharpshooter than you."

"Having a gun as an alternate form might have something to do that," I replied sarcastically to his back, at which Megatron gave me a quick smirk over his shoulder before turning back to the task at hand.

I watched as Megatron hefted my laser rifle and effortlessly blasted targets much farther away than the ones that I had chosen. Then he laid my weapon on the ground, transformed, and then it was my turn again. We went on like that for the next hour: Taking turns to see which of us could shoot the farther, faster, and more accurately than the other.

Each time Megatron transformed and landed in my hands, a shiver ran through my body, to the very depths of my core. Even back on Cybertron, his weapon mode had been my favorite. Maybe it was because he became so helpless in my hands, yet at the same time he was still so very powerful. I had never figured out my appreciation for his weapon alternate form, and I had kept those feelings a secret from Megatron himself for a great many years. Until…Well, until that fateful day a little over nine million years ago, of course…

"What are you doing, Prime?" Megatron's gruff voice suddenly announced, interrupting my reverie. He was standing in front of me with his arms crossed in front of his chest and with vast impatience evident in every nuance of his expression. "You're not reminiscing again, are you?" When I didn't immediately answer him, Megatron sighed and added, "You do this every time, Prime. The far-away look on your face and the quiet voice and….Argh! You're just too damned sentimental for your own good."

"I see nothing –" I stopped short in my protest when I noticed that I was speaking in a voice that was, indeed, softer than normal. I cleared my throat and tried again, this time in a deliberately normal tone of voice. "I see nothing wrong," I proclaimed, "with a little sentimental nostalgia, Megatron."

Megatron's expression was disgusted as he replied in a flat voice, "It's a weakness." Then he looked away from me and added thoughtfully, "It's a character flaw, Optimus. It makes you vulnerable to…" His voice trailed off and then he waved a hand in a gesture of frustration. "Argh!" he exclaimed again. "Never mind!"

As Megatron turned his back to me and stared off over the mesa, a wave of pity washed over me as I watched him sulk in front of a pile of boulders. This was the hardest part for him; it always had been. And the fact that _he_ had been the one who had called me to this meeting didn't make it any easier for him. I had always been the more demonstrative of the two of us, so he usually relied on me to initiate the bonding process, and this time, apparently, was going to be no different than all of the others had been.

I cautiously approached Megatron from behind him and gingerly slid my hands around his narrow waist. My fingers followed the familiar ridge on his waist from back to front and then back again. I was never sure how Megatron was going to react to my overtures, so I was gratified when he instantly relaxed and leaned back against my chest. Neither of us spoke; I simply reveled in the feel of his body so close to mine and didn't even bother to ask what he was thinking or feeling, for I knew I wouldn't get an answer. No, our bonding time had always taken place in complete silence. It had to be that way because, ever since the day we had met, we'd never had a verbal exchange that hadn't eventually devolved into an argument or even a physical fight.

Yes, ours was a very contentious – not to mention very _strange_ – bond; we were happiest when we were competing, fighting, or even trying to kill each other. The only time the fighting stopped was on the infrequent occasions when we came together for the specific purpose of bonding. The desire to do so certainly didn't stem from any kind of romantic love. We had both decided a long time ago that neither of us was built for romance. When it came time to unite, we were not drawn together out of simple love or physical attraction but out of a much deeper and far more complex need to feel…whole. We felt something _akin_ to love, I supposed, but I had long ago realized that it was actually more like an _appreciation_ of each other, an acknowledgement that each of our weaknesses were the other's strengths and that together we became one complete being, with no weaknesses…except, of course, for the "weakness" that our togetherness could never last for long. So, much as we both hated to admit it, Megatron and I needed each other. Our bond, formed millennia ago when we hadn't yet been official enemies, drew us strongly together whether we liked it or not.

Meanwhile, while I mused, Megatron turned around to face me. He wasn't smiling, but I could tell that he was enjoying my tactile attentions. I wasn't surprised when he put his arms around me and dropped his head to my chest, leaning against me.

"I hate you," he uttered fiercely as his hands began to stroke my back.

"I know," I replied simply, softly.

I knew what Megatron meant, after all. We hated the bond between us, wanted nothing more that to somehow cancel out its existence and be free of each other. But that was not possible…unless, of course, one of us were to be terminated. And unfortunately we had discovered that while we could hurt each other, we could not kill each other. Many times one of us had been given a golden opportunity to finish the other off, but neither of us had ever been able to follow through with it. In many ways, the battle that raged within and between us was just as intense as the one between our respective factions. We loved each other, and we hated each other. We wanted to kill each other, but because of our bond, one of us killing the other would be like killing himself. So we sent our warriors to do the killing for us, and Primus knows we'd both come close to death. But for some reason we always managed to pull through.

I moved my hands up to Megatron's shoulders, then to the sides of his neck, knowing from eons of experience each line and curve and angle of his well-formed body. Finally, I slipped my fingers up under his helmet and cupped the bottom of jaw to the back of his cranial chamber in my hands, forcing him to look up at me.

"I hate you, too," I said quietly to him.


End file.
